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child's drawing of a mummy & child

Going it Alone: A Guide for Solo Mums in the UK


Introduction: Single by happenstance, mother by choice

Chapter 1: Looking back, and where we are now
              1.1 A brief history of single mothering
              1.2 The current situation

Chapter 2: Choosing to go it alone
              2.1 Who are the solo mums?
              2.2 The nature vs. nurture debate
              2.3 Support networks and needs
              2.4 Dealing with negative reactions

Chapter 3: Choosing donor conception
              3.1 A brief history of assisted conception
              3.2 Is donor conception right for you?
              3.3 Getting ready for treatment     child's drawing of 3 blue sperms & 1 pink egg
              3.4 Choosing a fertility clinic
              3.5 Choosing a donor
              3.6 Treatment options
              3.7 Using informal systems
              3.8 Travelling abroad for
              3.9 Double donation and embryo donation:
                        the added genetic element
              3.10 Miscarriage
              3.11 When things don’t work

Chapter 4: Pregnancy, birth and the early days
              4.1 Antenatal care
              4.2 Diagnostic tests     child's drawing of pregnant mummy with baby inside her, both smiling
              4.3 Records and
              4.4 Building networks for
                         the future
              4.5 Planning for the birth
              4.6 Bonding
              4.7 Postnatal depression
              4.8 Lining your nest for the first few weeks
              4.9 Top ten tips to survive the first few
                         weeks as a solo mum

Chapter 5: Choosing adoption
              5.1 Adoption legislation and history
              5.2 Why adopt?
              5.3 The adoption process
              5.4 Overseas adoption
              5.5 The financial aspects of adoption
              5.6 Long-term fostering

Chapter 6: Telling & talking
              6.1 What to say, to whom     child's drawing of lots of people
                         and when?
              6.2 Family and Friends
              6.3 Workmates and
              6.4 Dealing with negative reactions
              6.5 Whose information is it anyway?
              6.6 Talking to children
              6.7 Children with different origins
                         in the same family

Chapter 7: Solo mothering
              7.1 Building your village     child's drawing of mummy cradling baby
              7.2 Developing a new identity
              7.3 Returning to work
              7.4 Finances
              7.5 Raising an only child
              7.6 Twins & multiples
              7.7 Trying for two, or more…
              7.8 Raising kids without a dad
              7.9 Preparing for the empty nest, eventually

Chapter 8: How do our children fare?
              8.1 Bringing the child’s needs to the fore
              8.2 What do children need?
              8.3 Our children's developing
                         identity     child's drawing of a child
              8.4 Fatherless children

Chapter 9: The legal and ethical context
              9.1 Ethics
              9.2 Your child’s rights
              9.3 The donor’s rights and duties
              9.4 Donor siblings
              9.5 The rights of the donor’s extended
              9.6 Gametes and embryos:
                         ownership and storage

Chapter 10:  Sibling and donor tracing
              10.1 Why seek to trace donor
              10.2 Why not?
              10.3 The early days of sibling tracing
              10.4 The obstacles in the UK
              10.5 Unique features of double or
                           embryo donation
              10.6 Background to provision of
                           donor information in the UK
              10.7 How to start tracing     child's drawing of 4 different people
              10.8 DNA testing
              10.9 Sibling tracing registries
              10.10 For those having treatment abroad
                           or outside the licensed system
              10.11 Donor tracing

Chapter 11: Contingency planning
              11.1 What to plan for and why?
              11.2 Paving the way
              11.3 Emergency measures
              11.4 Convalescence
              11.5 Appointing a guardian,
                          power of attorney,
                          making a will and advance directives
              11.6 Financial Planning

              Appendix 1: Who are the solo mums?
                          Survey of solo mums in the DCN,
                          June 2015
              Appendix 2: What if your child is disabled?
              Appendix 3: Grateful to receive, glad to give
                          - Emma’s egg-sharing story
              Appendix 4: Lottie’s story: How she came
                          to have a known donor
              Appendix 5: Notes from the empty nest

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